Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus

Year: 2009
Country: USA
Tagline: Winner... Eats... All!
Plot: I just don't understand why this movie was ever made...Maybe the producer was itching to let some (a few million) dollars slip out of his fingers, just like that. Apart from the title of the movie, there is nothing else that is worthy of attention...This movie was Dead Dull from beginning to end, and bear with me as I unfold its mysteries (as if there were any!!!)(AGAIN, SPOILERS AHEAD, SO SAVE YOURSELF SOME TIME AND CONSIDER THE ABOVE MESSAGE AS A WARNING AND CARRY ON WITH YOUR BUSINESS!!!) ........................................................................................ ............................................................................................................. .....................................................So you decided to read anyway. Never mind, let's begin: It all starts when two scientists accidentally discover a mega shark and giant octopus buried in ice under the sea. Now the ice obviously breaks due to a whale collapsing incident, which our doctors were right on time to witness by the way, on an experimental submarine which they had stolen for exploration (probably written in script to give the BADASS side to the otherwise nerdy protagonist, i.e, Deborah Gibson, the woman playing Emma).Anyway, soon after these prehistoric creatures are at loose once again, they start hunting for food and bizarre incidents start happening all around the globe like tearing up of an oil rig by our friend octopus and disappearance of an airplane flying at 15,000 feet at around 200 nautical miles per hour, courtesy Mega Shark (Come on now, enough is enough!! I could digest the oil rig bit, but this is too much! The shark actually jumps I don't know 15,000 feet in the air, grabs the plane by its wings and plummits it down under the ocean, Jesus!)Anyhoo, soon the story turns to our protagonists Emma, her retired or I don't know retarded professor and her would-be lover Dr. Seiji Shimada for a solution to this menace...So after a lot of of shots devoted to what can only be described as a high school chemistry laboratory, our fellow doctors come up with a solution: Pheromones - to lure them as bait (only after having an intense session of love making in the so-called research lab storage room: this is where it strikes them!!! What a lame excuse to put a Sex Scene into the movie!!)The creatures however are too smart for us humans and although they get lured by pheromones (now who wouldn't!), they eventually escape, These are troubled times as our Governments are now thinking of deploying nukes to stop these beasts and by governments I mean a guy with a ponytail A.K.A. Allan Baxter played by Lorenzo Lamas, now I still couldn't figure out which agency was he working for, and honestly speaking I have not enough stamina or will to watch this movie again, just for that!Ultimately our genius doctors/scientists decide that since the pheromone thing worked a little bit, they are gonna give it another try, but this time they'll lure the beasts to a single location far from civilization under the ocean abyss, so that they can kill each other off and finally finish off what they started millions of years ago... The rest, my friends, as they say, is History...P.S. The special effects were not so "special"...P.P.S. If these creatures were so hungry all the time why didn't they destroyed the submarine (which had EMMA AND VINCE on board) and eat them, when it was meters away when they first got loose?? (My guess: otherwise the movie would not have been made!!!)Watch it at your own risk!!!The movie is about the hunt for two enormous prehistoric sea creatures causing mayhem and carnage on the California coast: Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus as they battle each other for supremacy of the sea.
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